The RAGE Report: Issue #9

Friday, July 18, 2025: Proto gays and bitter days.

Get mad, stay mad, make jokes.

Jeffrey Epstein, hero of the left.

This week—like every week, really—has been so dumb. To blame, as always, is the dumb president and his frighteningly competent (some of them) administration, but not for the usual reasons. MAGA world is self-cannibalizing over the Epstein files, and sensing blood in the water, the left is dowsing some sriracha all over that shit. To further complicate this metaphor, of all the hills for MAGA to die on, fitting it would be on Jeffrey Epstein’s private sex island.

To be clear, I couldn’t care less about these files. They’re a distraction; most thinking people already known Donald Trump is a perv, and there are numerous photos of he and Epstein together. What I am interested in, however, is the irony in full effect. Trump and his lackeys have long trafficked in conspiracies, the most overt being, perhaps, “The Big Lie”—that he actually won the 2020 election, despite all proof to the contrary. So it was only a matter of time before one of those conspiracies came back to bite them in the ass.

Of course, a part of me wants to put on my RuPaul opera glasses ‘cuz I can’t wait to see how this turns out.

But the overwhelming rest of me just doesn’t care. MAGA people suck. Trump sucks. Epstein sucked. I don’t need a file to tell me that—some of Trump’s acolytes clearly need it to finally realize that he’s simply a charlatan in a bad toupee, but the signs have been there for years. Decades, really.

However this turns out, Trump will still be president, the Republicans, for now, will still have control over Congress, and the Supreme Court will still continue bending over to let this administration stick it in, raw and unlubed.

Point being, there are bigger things, more important things, than the Epstein files. Still, it’s nice seeing Trump finally get hoisted by his own generous petard.

Let’s spread the rage.